Big sigh.... it's been a rough week, but it's
coming to an end. Today's my last day at the office before a four-day weekend.
The kids still go to school tomorrow, and we've got hockey this weekend, but
I'll still be able to accomplish some stuff.
The oxycon is
scheduled to arrive on the 6th, so no rush to get my minor set up. Whatever I
do this weekend, will be on the hothead.
My musing for today has to do with being
reclusive, being out there at all times, or finding some middle ground.
As an independent artist, it's within my natural
tendency to want to work alone and not have to socialize... definitely not have
to market myself... ugh.
But, the reality is that the more "out
there" and visible I am, the more attention I bring to myself and my work
and the more sales I make.
Blah!
I had a really crappy experience earlier this
week in a place called Etsy. Etsy is a (relatively) new selling place for
self-representing artists (er... I think that's sort
of their mission statement).
Anyway, knowing that you have to make yourself
visible in order to initiate interest usually, I headed over the forums (online
discussion groups). Truthfully, I found very little there that interested me,
so I wandered down to the "
I ended up reading this one thread and posted a
typical Laura-style musing. Someone, however, decided to infer (and she even admitted
that she was inferring... she said "my tone"... MY
TONE?!?!? I'm typing for god's sake... there's no tone!)... anyway, she
decided to infer I was giving the original poster a hard time in that I wanted
to know if she'd "learned her lesson".
Wow, um... okay, I never said anything like
that. But as the conversation went on, I soon realized she was one of those
people who (purposely or not, I have no idea) repeatedly misinterprets and then
misquotes others... apparently has her own agenda and/or just likes to pick
fights.
What's worse is that she's supposedly one of Etsy's better known sellers. So now I have a not pleasant
impression of Etsy. And, I have ZERO desire to frequent the forums. Do I care
that my anonymity there will result in fewer sales? Apparently not... 'cause I now have absolutely NO desire to be visible in the forums.
Two reasons. One,
my first and repulsive experience as a newbie poster. And two, just
where does one draw the line? I mean, yeah, it makes sense that the more
visible you make yourself, the more sales you'll make, but just how far is one
willing to take that? Do you sacrifice everything else in your life in order to
LIVE on the internet, frequenting as many forums as possible?
And in a creepy way, that reminds me why I stopped
writing horror fiction.
We (Mike and I) attended a horror con several
years back, and I came away from it realizing that schmoozing was a much larger
part of the industry (and one's success) than I was willing to make it.
I guess I like the idea of an artist just doing
his art and waiting to be discovered... but man, that just does NOT happen (or
if it does, it's so few and far between, I'm not sure anyone I know will ever
see it).
Sigh...
So, my point? I have to decide how
much schmoozing/marketing I'm willing to do for my art.
And I've decided that the Etsy Forums aren't in
the big picture for me.
Okay, enough said... now let's get to the daily gratefuls...
Today I'm grateful that:
- Someone noticed I hadn't been
around much this week in
- I can walk through the house
(middle floor) and not feel like the aisles are closing in on me
- Rick has a swimming pool...
even if we're having a hard time making it over to Mom's house... at least
we know it's there
- We've been able to help the
homeless guy who works at our house on a regular basis
- There's a grocery store two
blocks away from the house that opens at
Okay, I'll write. I don't want to. I'm
completely stir crazy today. Not a good way to start
the week. I mean, it makes sense to be stir crazy on
Friday 'cause then I'm anxious to get out of the office and start my
weekend.... but on a Monday? Yikes!
Also, I woke up at 4... Mike was snoring and
doing his sleep apnea thing, and I just couldn't get past it. I wonder if soon I'll
be relegated to sleeping on the couch... hm... 6 cats
COULD be worse than one snoring man... I don't know.
Today is the kids' first day of school. Maybe
that's part of my ... inability to concentrate.
BTW, we're taking care of a friend's puppy for a
few days. She's a real cutie, but Bear doesn't really understand how to do
"dog play". The puppy even tries to entice the cats to play. They, of
course, will have none of that.
I'm a little disappointed in a custom order I'm
doing. I was unable, despite searching low and high, to get my hands on the
exact shade of bead I wanted. L
I need to respond to email.
Okay, today's gratefuls...
I'm grateful that:
- Others seemed to like my second
set of lentils as much as I did
- I don't know anyone who's
bi-polar (and by that I just mean I'm fortunate that no one in my family
has this very difficult and potentially devastating illness)
- I got two rooms really clean
this weekend... the carpet is disgusting and there's no getting around
that, and there
- My kids are not only literate,
they enjoy reading. Yay!
- We can walk around in the
backyard (sorry, I didn't get any "before" pictures)
Wow... I'm so sleep all of a sudden. Oh man...
it's gonna be an early night.
BUT! Before I can go to bed, I have to think
ahead. What are the kids going to have for breakfast? What are they going to
take for lunch? Did I call
Sigh...
Sorry (again).
Yeah, it's been a couple of "filled"
days in a row. A "filled" day is usually one in which I just go from
point A to point B in a straight line.... no time for computer, no time for rest,
no time for anything... hockey, work, errands, etc.
And yes, that also means I'm probably alienating
a bunch of family and friends 'cause I haven't been able to email this past
week either. Hmph!
But I still have to do my gratefuls,
so here they come...
Today I'm grateful that:
- Gabe now has a totally awesome
and really pretty futon bed and it didn't even cost anything
- Despite the face that Mar and
Jag sound like they're beating the crap out of Tennie
on a daily basis, Ten doesn't SEEM the worse for wear from it (not
physically, anyway... he is, however, an emotional wreck!)
- Mike's internet connection came
back up without too much time or expenditure on our parts
- Monica is not only KEEPING her
creative flow going but is expanding on it
- Gabe is socializing
Okay, now I have to go catch up on a ton of
things I'm behind in.
And now, whenever I end a sentence with a
preposition, I'll think of Patrice. :-)
I'm not in the mood to do an entry today, but I
know if I don't it easily turns into two days, then three, etc.
I'm not happy that I don't have control over (er... or suddenly can't figure out) the text in here. I
don't want everything bold. Blah!
Ate something "off" today for lunch...
hope I don't get sick (food poisoning) now. Hmph!
I guess I'll continue cleaning the house
tonight. The computer room, at least.
My lw
bead auctions are going higher. Eek! I don't even want to show them here...
don't want to risk anyone else bidding on them.
Talk about confidence, eh?
:-)
So let's see... what can I
pull out of the hat for today's grateful things...
Today I'm grateful that:
- I have a window in my office...
I have a constant 12'x12' view from the 16th floor
- It's our week and weekend with
the kids
- Gabe has social plans for this
weekend... which is good for him and then it also frees up Mon and I for
together time
- We have money to do some
impromptu things we want to do in life
- Skunky is now a quasi-holdable kitten
Shrug... feelin' just
a smidge out of sorts today... this week... shrug...
Nothing wrong, so don't feel badly for me or
worry or anything... just... maybe I feel unfocused... or maybe it was my
lunch. Ha!
Okay, TTYL!
The ball of my foot hurts today. VERY much. Sigh...
So I mentioned that Skunky's
been coming into the house in the mornings, when Bear comes in. This morning after I let him explore for a few minutes I decided he
should probably go out. I found him curled into a ball under the coffee
table, purring away. I picked him up and he kept purring! I was petting him for
about half a minute while holding him before he realized his craziness and
sprang out of my arms, making a beeline for the door. Heh
I wasn't as productive today as I feel I should
have been.
I did do some SRAJD stuff, though.
I think I'm procrastinating on the court
papers... but as mom says, I need to develop a positive attitude about it.
A friend of mine and I decided we're going to
write a book about... divorce and the aftermath. I'll probably be sued, but it
will be funny.
Okay, today's gratefuls
(and I hope I'm not already repeating myself)... I'm thankful that:
- Hockey is starting up again so
I can socialize with my friends and the kids get to play what they like
- The SRAJD stuff is up to date
(for now, anyway)
- I actually remembered to bring
stuff that I'm supposed to send to people... my "guilt" list is
winding down
- (but also stunned and nervous )
I have a bunch of watchers on a bead set I put up
- I have good friends who do nice
things... got a very nice belated b'day present
today from some people who are always too nice and far too generous... but
thank you
Okay, over and out until tomorrow...
Got control (on paper, at least) of my bills. I
should say "our bills", but no one else really pays attention to
them, so I'll just call them "my bills".
Today's "I'm grateful
that... "
Sometimes when I forget if I've paid a bill, I
find out that I did.... love that!
I have some beads that came out kind of okay and
I can put up a listing
I have friends who support my art (and are
currently bidding on some way beginner beads of mine on eBay)
Jason doesn't have hockey today 'cause when the
ex forgot to pick up his kids today, Gabe was really excited 'cause it meant he
was then free to go to Jason's lesson and get shot on... I wanted Gabe to be
happy, but it really would have been a HUGE inconvenience to run around at the
last minute like that
The days are still long
Blah... 5 days without
an entry. Just remember, Laura... guilt is a useless emotion. Hmph!
So, let's start with our daily "gratefuls"...
I'm grateful Donna did something stupid a week
ago and ended up IMing with me and from there talked
me into signing up for Margaret Zinser lampworking
class at the Sonoma bead show last Friday
I'm grateful a minor can be run on natural gas
I'm grateful my current lampwork
bead auctions have bids (pathetic doesn't enter into the equation)
I'm grateful the kids (or at least Gabe) get to
play hockey tonight... they really miss it
I'm grateful Skunky is
a cutiepie and not as afraid of everything as his
brother
So... today I'm putting the finishing touches on
the final court papers. I really hate doing this. I hate everything involved
from thinking, to writing, and definitely to going and having to face the ex
and his lawyer... wish *I* had a lawyer. Hmph!
But life can't be all rosy... or can it?
Remind me tomorrow to talk about Monica's
jewelry designing.
Oh, and I'm looking into why my guestbook
suddenly doesn't work anymore.
I guess I don’t feel like talking much right
now... sorry... will try again tomorrow...
Took Monica to hockey
camp this morning. She loved it. Came home… Gabe said he was bored… wanted to play
hockey. He could have tonight, but they had to go to their dad's for dinner.
They don't even bother asking him anymore.
Blackie's back. She is totally NOT nice to Skunky and Homer. I'm sure she disappeared for a couple
weeks 'cause she had another litter. She was SOOOOO attached to Skunky and Homie… it's an amazing
sight to see, her just dissing them now.
Mar's been really bad, attacking Ten all the time lately. Sigh…
Okay, my grateful things for today:
- I'm grateful the
- I'm grateful the kids helped me
clean the car without fussing.
- I'm grateful I'm making headway
on the kitchen… would like to get the whole house in order eventually.
- I'm grateful I can watch the
cats play and interact… it entertains me.
- I'm grateful I haven't had to
use an alarm clock in about 10 years (unless I have to catch a plane or
something and just can't take the chance).
Okay, Mon's home… gotta
go…
Oops, kinda forgot to
do any updates over the weekend.
Alright, let's do the gratitude thing straight
off the bat ('cause it's the most fun).
1) I'm grateful that I was able to do the
project I wanted to do, which was making a holder for my glass rods for
lampworking. I had previously been using mason jars...
... and now I have this
(created with PVC)...
2) I'm really grateful that my second project,
although not perfect, at least came out pretty good. So, like once a year (it
seems), I get a wild hair up my rear and want to make a pc creation... a
necklace always, so far. The first one was Hakone Sunset, the second was Peacockso, and this weekend I created my third. I'm not
done... I still have to try to reinforce the do-dads that stick out of it which
will surely break off and I can't have that as this was going to be the first
one I put up for sale... sigh... and then I have to varnish it and actually
MAKE the necklace. Well, we'll see... I'm at least pleased with the first part
of it.
3) I'm grateful Blackie's still alive. She came
back to eat... but since she was gone for about 3 weeks or so, I'm guessing
that means she just had another litter somewhere. Ugh!
4) I'm grateful the kids came back from their
vacation safe and sound.
5) I'm grateful most of the bills are currently
paid.
Okay, now onto other things...
My friend and I had a talk last night about two
things we want to work on in our lives. One is getting healthy, the other is
... not sure what the word is... becoming more tolerant? Learning to control
our emotions?
Well, I'll try to post any progress or tips I
come up with.
On the way to work today I had an internal
dialogue about how the words "good" and "well" are used
with the verb "looks".
So we all know that if it's used as an
adjective, it's "good" (That was a good meal.).
And if it's used as an adverb, it's
"well" (He play guitar well.).
But then I was thinking about traffic. You say,
"Traffic looks good".
But if you're saying HOW the traffic looks,
wouldn't it be well?
But "looks" is a transitive verb. That
means it can't stand alone. Like "holds". "He holds...."
See, something has to go after it.
So maybe the rule is, "Use well instead of
good if it's being used as an adverb, but use good when it's an adjective or
the object of a transitive verb".
Yikes!
Oh, and since the "server" was busy
and I didn't get to post this, I've now had breakfast. My
update. Ha ha ha! A banana, a V-8 (which doesn't have added sugar, btw), and a
hard-boiled egg. Total Fat: 6 grams; Total Calories: 350; Total Carbs: 42
Blah! That's just not good enough!
Okay, it was still better than chocolate milk
and donuts, but I must be more careful.
I feel good. Unfortunately, there's something in
me going, "Yeah, but it's just temporary"... or..
"It's a feeling based on false hope; don't buy into it."